[ At least a tiny smile does appear on his face when she encourages and reassures him like that. It's nice to hear, even if it's a little bit difficult to believe about himself - especially in this moment, when he's struggling with so much. But.. he does want her to feel like her words have effect, like he appreciates them.

That's why he still gives her that little smile, though the look in his eyes definitely makes it a sad smile. ]

That people can-- That I can raise a baby right.

[ He almost trips over his own words. Something in his facial expression and voice seems complicated, like he's trouble having the right words, or like he's trying really hard to avoid using certain specific words here. ]

When I was younger.. um. [ ... He's silent for a moment, and Fabian ducks his head in an attempt to hide his face a little bit. ] Cathilda, our maid, she-- She told me that mama had.. trouble. [ Fabian speaks so slowly, still searching for words. ] Looking after me.